Date Reported: 23 June 2025
Location: Elliott’s Shed, Nr Charlton, Wiltshire

Photograph by Nick Bull

When we first saw one of Nick Bull’s photographs of this crop circle on the Wiltshire-Dorset border — reported by a genuine member of the public as well! — we thought it looked like it could be extremely promising:

Photograph by Nick Bull

Then we looked a bit closer and thought to ourselves that the join in the middle between the two halves was a bit off-kilter. And then … yes … and then … we saw the overhead:

An image full of fail. 

Let’s explore the ‘circles’ on the left curve. The third from the end of this malformed necklace is the worst we’ve seen in many a year, looking vaguely pentagonal.

The standing central ‘circle’ is another stinker. It would be more apt to describe it as a polygon. 

The upper line of the left curve wanders around like a drunk at closing time in Leith. 

Then there’s the strange line that’s been stomped into the crop to the right, and just below, the central polygon. Just why didn’t the morons attempt to stand the wheat back up? 

So, which group of amateurs were responsible? Do we even need to answer that. It’s pretty obvious given the two names that came out to defend their Team Ten Watt brethren. Mark ‘Billy’ Breen claimed everything was okay and that the ‘fresh wheat has risen’. 

No, Billy. You have no idea whatsoever. Whilst the wheat has risen — it was too immature to be used effectively — that doesn’t cover up the myriad of errors it contains. (By the way Billy, we know that your video of the sunset at the Kingdon hoax was taken before the circle was made public. It’s amazing how features in the field, as well as weather conditions for individual sunsets can give the game away.)

Meanwhile, Breen’s good friend Frank Smithland fluffed his lines, poutily pointing a finger at the Crop Circle Connector‘s photographer Nick Bull. We expect he’d written this having just rolled out of bed following a long night of sweating. 

All in, this latest offering from Team Ten Watt seems to suggest a rather unfortunate, wasted night spent in the field. It joins the ranks of their other ‘iconic’ works such as the ‘waste disposal unit‘. Perhaps the Elliott’s Shed hoax should go the same way as its cousin … though we’re not sure if the individual responsible can squeeze in through the gate anymore.

We won’t waste any further words on this slop.