Date Reported: 11 April 2024
Location: Wimborne Minster, Dorset

Look at this:

Photograph by Ben Sasson Photography

We like Ben Sasson’s photo, but as for the circle. It’s … umm … oh. That’s original. It looks a lot like this from a couple of years ago …

… Which looks a lot like countless other circles through the years. Truth is, the majority of those formations reported in this state tend to have been abandoned. Though, given the hilarious backslapping in one corner of Facebook, the new circle may have actually been designed to look like it does. Or maybe those responsible have no shame and and are happy to put their name to something that any other circle maker would be content to see disappear. 

Either way, this uninspiring circle-ring combo in oilseed rape is the hoax that gets the 2025 season underway. 

An early contender for quote of the year, 2025.

How do we know it’s a hoax? It was reported through an ‘anonymous contributor’ in an obscure Facebook group run by Team Ten Watt reprobate Deiniol ‘Dan’ Davies. All of a sudden it’s picked up and shared in another Facebook group operated by Ten Watt colleague Dene Hine. Funny that.

Photograph by Ben Sasson Photography

And then look closely at the video which can be found online. Which flat cap wearing, reigning ‘Top of the Croppies’ champion do you see walking around inside the circle? Billy Breen, of course! We hope he enjoyed his night in the field being shown the ropes and we are certain he’s going to be doing a lot of ferrying backwards and forwards between Somerset and Bristol this year. Watch it coincide with posts on Facebook making out he’s somewhere totally different to where he really is.

Hopefully future efforts will be better than this waste of crop. After all, you know its bad when the best one of the makers can say about it is that it touches two (narrowly spaced) tramlines.