A lack of self-awareness is the key in this installment of Croppie Gossip.
The Croppie Couldn’t Have Put It Better
Sometimes no commentary is necessary…
The Last You’ll Read Here About Enzo … Probably
After featuring here a fair bit as a form of early season entertainment, Laurence ‘Enzo Brabazon’ Gibson has revealed the true nature of his circles tomfoolery. He has just launched his website and it’s full of as much bullshit as you would expect:
Let’s set the record straight. Gibson was at least ten miles away from the location of ‘Crop circle no.1’ when it appeared at Stanton St Bernard. Furthermore, he only predicted ‘Crop circle no.3’ to be a copy of Metatron’s Cube after The Croppie’s old friend Geoff Watson posted an image of an old circle with a similar motif. Gibson’s actual prediction was this:
It was sheer coincidence that a similar design subsequently appeared at Broad Hinton, paid for by Epic Games to promote the video game Fortnite. When challenged by one croppie Gibson had the nerve to say he’d commissioned the circle himself!
But this is what bad psychics do. They make up lies and attempt to make themselves out to be the recipient of magical powers. Very often it’s in the interests of making money and look…
That’s right. Part with your cash and receive some mumbo-jumbo from Laurence, including a personalised GIF you could make yourself for free! Perhaps the money is needed to pay for the costs of travelling between London and Dorset on a fruitless hunt for a crop circle that seems not to have existed. Apparently he was tipped off by telephone calls from aliens!
Fortunately, things have begun to backfire on Gibson. The naughty ‘psychic’ has been banned from various groups on social media for his incessant spamming, thereby depriving himself of chances to gain subscribers to his ridiculous website.
Fingers crossed Laurence Gibson has condemned himself to crop circle irrelevancy. It could certainly seem this way as he’s issued a lengthy apology on his personal Facebook profile. Then again, he’s still spamming his website in his apology!
This is central control, this is central control. Interlocutor representing the elder council of Jupiter transmitting to Earth communication from Korton concerning Metatron and his wish for the rapid fiscal recovery of Tower Hamlets and environs……
Korton regrets that despite his best tips over private channels our Agent on Earth, Enzo has dropped the ball – orb, one might say – on his adventures in the Wiltshire undergrowth.
Korton can only assume that One can lead a horse to water but One cannot make said horse drink richly of the good stuff, if they are going to blow it all on poor quality merch and a discount web host. Cute little crazy fruitbat that he is.
Metatron’s next appearance as a holy trinity of really quite basic geometry may yet come to pass due to the superb weather at the moment, but only if Korton/Metatron Prime’s super casual and loosely associated Neo-Orb gang can be bothered with flogging this one…. and at this stage it might be more fruitful to go messing about again with the Bejewelled posse (always fun, and the comfort of my breezy Oxford bags are unsurpassed. I should mention, none of those events go down without a cold thermos of Pimms to ease the process – so civilised,.. and a cut above the usual standard of refreshments I must say) and remotely poking a couple of overseas experts on the scene – one of which woke from his dog-like slumber into a fit of numerology. Oh I do hope he’s coming in person like last time we met. Some crooked feller must have been posting stuff about that hidden ley-line (connecting the circles through Clench) into his PM feed again, priming him for that seizure. That Red Right Hand in his favourite group is most dubious; Nothing exciting ever happened in Clench.
Solar disruptor energy increasing, Illudium Q-36 explosive space modulator reaching criticality. Channel fading, Korton discontinue. Discontinue….. D i s c o n t i n u e…
Dear letters to the editor,
Although lil’Enzo might be off with the faeries the eclipse circle down at “Mud” Lane is a smash hit with the Croppie crowd. That is a really nice and positive thing to see. There is not enough love for the craft these days, whether the craft in question is a shiny hubcap with anti-gravity drive, or a guy with a plank beside him, surveying the darkness.
Everyone brings too many preconceptions to the game.
I’ve long been receptive to the idea that sophisticated shapes are overrated, especially if they lean too hard into anthropomorphic symbology. Sometimes a really fundamental and visceral form is better.
What’s not to like?
Love, like Johnny Cash’s burning ring, is a fiery thing. This week, at the end of the tape, I was thinking of JC’s other hit song “I Walk The Line”, but I always get the lyrics mixed up with the Alien Sex Fiend version (top British pop combo, for the uninitiated). JC is undoubtably a highly skilled and sophisticated artist, but a little fuzz and grime from Mr and Mrs Fiend is just what the doctor ordered for times like these. Punky punk.
The Croppie was shocked to hear from Enzo on 12th June that the Mud Lane circle had been transformed overnight. It was no longer an eclipse but a full on Metatron’s Cube. Having a reporter just two miles away The Croppie was able to investigate. No change even though EB claimed to have video footage.
He did have video footage showing something strange on the ground @ mud lane; for a while….. until the message expired.
The Dundas Research Group is in possession of some interesting material through a channel they can never admit to having opened. They’ll have to deny it if asked.
The Croppie has heard it all before.
The Croppie has heard it all before.
Hi. Enzo here.
The for.mation WAS enhanced, over the whole field, but sadly in a dimension only I can access.
I can take you there to see it but it’ll cost you £49.99. And you’ll have to be blind folded as metty poos is shy.
Happy to clear that up. Enzo.
Thanks for the clarification Enzo. Appreciated.
I’m never too sure if We are part of a cabal, a cartel, a conspiracy or a cornucopia of circuitously calamitous intent.
Enzo has reminded me that Orbs, or spheres are related to circles, but with an extra dimension in Space, or Spacetime to be strictly correct in the relativistic sense.
What extra dimensions are in play with Jay Jay? It’s a very good question as to who has been plying our intrepid Miss Marple with inside information. I have a suspicion. Code word Witchcraft.
First Enzo was the real deal, with an uncanny ability to foresee circles. But then his circles were a bit wonky. Then they were sabotaged, both in the real world and in photoshop. What on Earth can be going on? It’s a classic playbook.
The press will never take this seriously, even though we all know what we we actually experienced and even recorded in the fields at night, it’s not for people like Miss Marple to know, and she probably suspects this by now. She needs to be protected from full disclosure even though she does not realize it. Keep up the good work, Enzo.